What Makes A Great Roommate?
Should you room with someone you know from high school or church camp
or should you just jump in with both feet and meet all new
people? That’s a tough one, and there’s no right or wrong
answer. Some students say that living with someone they already
know makes the transition easier; others say that living with a friend
kept them from meeting new people and getting involved in new
activities. Here are some suggestions you might want to consider
as you make your decision.
The best roommate is someone whose lifestyle fits easily with yours,
who shares your study habits, and is someone with whom you can talk and live. Sometimes, roommates become best friends, but not
always. You may get along great
sharing a room, but you don’t necessarily
hang out with them.
Oftentimes, best friends from home decide they wish to be
roommates. Be sure to discuss lifestyle issues
carefully. Living together on a day-in, day-out basis can be hard
on a friendship!
Break the Ice: You Can Call or Write
One of the great things about Trevecca housing is that you receive your
assignment either at summer orientation or approximately four weeks
before we open for the fall semester. If you come to summer
orientation you can meet your roommate and exchange addresses and phone
numbers right then and there. If you are unable to come to
summer orientation you will receive your assignment and the name and
address of your roommate in a letter. That means you can get in
touch and make plans before you arrive, which takes a lot of pressure
off that first day.
Laying the Groundwork
Begin by talking with one another about your families, reasons for
choosing Trevecca, your majors, interests, and hobbies. What time
of day or night do you like to study? How much noise can you
tolerate while studying? Are you a socially active person or one of
solitude? Do you like to have people around, or do you need time to be
alone? Knowing each other’s likes and dislikes will take
you a long way in beginning to build a positive living environment.
Attitudes about lifestyles vary greatly. It is rare for roommates
to agree on everything. Remember, others have the right to their
own opinions, and you don’t have to win them over to your way of
thinking. Different is not necessarily wrong. And
flexibility is a precious commodity when it comes to being a roommate.
What If I Just Can’t Live With My Roommate?
Do your best to communicate your concerns to your roommate
first. If you cannot resolve it on your own, then talk with
your resident assistant and/or your resident director. They will
help you work through any problems and find a workable option. If
all else fails, roommate changes can be made early in the semester or
between semesters.
HOW TO MAKE IT WORK
Communicate: It’s the most important element in building a
successful relationship with your roommate. If something is
bothering you, the sooner you talk about it, the sooner you’ll have it
resolved.
Be Open and Friendly: It
takes a lot of energy to be either on the giving or receiving end of
the cold shoulder. Instead of giving it…talk about what’s
bothering you. If you get it…ask why.
Be Understanding: Everyone can be irrational at times, or in a bad mood, or just
down. Try to understand the motives behind your roommate’s
actions. Helping one another through the tough times builds a
strong relationship.
Give Each Other Some Space:
Togetherness is great, but you can have too much of a good thing.
Consider your roommate’s need for time alone, and find your quiet time
when he/she is at class or an activity. If it doesn’t work our
naturally…talk about it.
Ask Before You Borrow: Each
person has a different comfort level on sharing belongings. Unless you
already have come to an agreement on common-use items, ask
first and avoid misunderstandings.
Define Neatness: There’s
a lot of room between a neat-freak and a slob. Talk with your
roommate about where you fall on the scale. You can each adjust
accordingly and find a place that suits you both.
